Musings of the Misguided: Kids say the darndest things

Tuesday 23 October 2012

Kids say the darndest things

One of the joyous and possibly quite scariest thing about having a toddler is they start to learn how to talk and come out with the cutest and most cringe worthy phrases.

Devil Spawn already has sarcasm down to an art. I think it's awesome and considering I'm fluent in sarcasm, it was inevitable. He most used phrase I think is easily 'alright' of course said with a sigh and eye roll. This is usually after I have told him to pick up his toys for the tenth time in the space of an hour. I wouldn't have to nag you if you did it the first time kid.

I think it's almost a right ofpassage for a toddler to drop the 'f' bomb at some stage. Usually in public. Recently while out at my parents Devil Spawn dropped it, and used it in perfect context. I didn't know whether to hug him or yell at him. What I did do was burst out laughing and attempt, in between fits of giggles to tell him it was naughty.

At the moment Devil Spawn is convinced that everyone is a man. We have many arguments about Mummy being a man and not a girl. Usually said with a sarcastic giggle from Devil Spawn. When used in the safety of The Funny Farm it's pretty safe. When used on a bus not so much. It usually involves me hissing at him that that's a lady not a man and me receiving a dirty look from said lady.

Mispronunciation is pretty funny too. Devil Spawn says dick instead of stick. When said in the right context it gets a bit old school girl giggle from me. His other mispronunciation though has the potentional to be a bit more mortifying. When he says 'can't' it sounds an awful lot like a swear word used to describe the female anatomy. Oh yes it's so awesome when we are at the local shopping centre and I ask him to to do something and he yells at the top of his voice 'I c*nt'. Oh yeh that.

His favourite phrase at the moment is 'begusting' aka 'disgusting'. I use the term to describe the things up his nose that he refuses to let me remove. Devil Spawn prefers to use it to describe food that he is served. I don't mind it so much when its about noodles from the local noodle place (hey more for me) but when he uses it to describe the food I serve up, then shit has just gotten real.
What are some pearlers that your cherubs have come out with? Do you cringe every time they open their mouth in public?

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Labels: IBOT, isn't he cute, kids, mother of the year, parenting

8 Comments:

At 23 October 2012 at 07:01 , ann said...: I am a "good boy"!! I love a kid swearing in public especially when its not mine!!
At 23 October 2012 at 09:24 , Unknown said...: Kids are funny loo. My daughter was learning her spelling "duck" and "fun" and she misspelled it as "f--k". I tried my hardest not to laugh lol
At 23 October 2012 at 11:37 , Mumabulous said...: Team 'Abulous were in a junk store yesterday when we passed a Mum and a little boy. The little boy was threatening to "fart again". I just burst out laughing which didn't help his poor Mum at all. I am sorry sister.
At 23 October 2012 at 12:21 , TheThingsIdTellYou said...: Alexander used to call vaginas "Jemimas" and once in the ladies toilets at a shopping centre, when we were (yet again) having the conversation as to why I didn't have a penis he piped up (loudly) with "Oh! That's right. You have a Jemima! Mama, I LOOOOVE Jemimas!!). Lots of giggles heard from the other stalls.

Sammy calls elevators 'alligators'. 'Tis very cute.
At 23 October 2012 at 13:37 , Bachelormum said...: I can't repeat my daughter's clangers but I do know she got them mostly from accompanying me driving - i never usually talk like a gutter snipe but i do when i'm behind the wheel as she has reminded me :-)
At 23 October 2012 at 13:55 , Anonymous said...: When my daughter was younger, she couldn't say "speech impediment". THAT got lots of laughs.
At 23 October 2012 at 16:01 , Carly said...: Thanks for the laughs! Miss O is 3 and whipped out a perfectly placed "it's just so f@#king annoying" on a recent camping trip in France.... it was heard loud and clear by all around.
On these occasions I have learnt to ignore her and not laugh or tell her off because if I give it any attention I know the little monkey is going to run with it like the wind and repeat again and again!
At 23 October 2012 at 19:58 , Unknown said...: Ha ha - love it!!! I too have some little darlings that tell me my food is disgusting!! Bless 'em.
Probably the most embarrassing moment was when my now 12 year old was about 2 and a seriously overweight man walked into the dr's surgery - Master 2 yelled out "mum - look at that big fat man!" Yep, wanted a hole to open up in the ground and just swallow me up.

Kids say the darndest things

Musings of the Misguided

Tuesday 23 October 2012

Kids say the darndest things

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